I'm serious y'all, what you are about to read is thing your tattoo artist I probably thinking, but is too polite to tell you.
1. We don't care what Kat Von D did this week on her soap opera. There are many more artists out there with just as much, if not more talent, without all the drama.
2. That cute little tattoo that you spent 30 minutes going through 100 pages of flash that called your name, and you had to have? Well, it called to at least 20 other people in the past 2 months, too.
3. The "custom" piece your buddy "drew" for you, that's one of a kind? Ten bucks says I can go to my flash racks and find that "custom, one of a kind piece".
4. Your spouse's/boyfriend's/girlfriend's name - yeah, that's not a tattoo - that's a property marker. And in 95% of them, we, or someone else will be covering it in a year.
5. We are actually not charging you as much as our time is worth. Even though you think tattoo prices are high, sometimes it barely covers our supplies.
6. Tips, while not expected, really are appreciated.
7. Your 15 person support group is not needed. The tattoo will not hurt any less with them there. (In fact, if you are one of the unlucky few that get light-headed or sick, you now have 15 people that WILL tell EVERYONE you know.)
8. Tribal art is not a fun tattoo to do. Go steal your kids' coloring books, and start coloring in them. You can only use a black crayon though. Let me know afte the first or second solid black picture how much fun it is.
9. Do not expect a stellar response if you ask for tribal, Taz, the Superman symbol, or barbwire. I'd bet almost anything, that we have seen and done every variation of those.
10. Not every tattoo has to have a meaning. Many of your artist's tattoos are there simply because we liked them. There are no stories behind them. Really. I promise.
11. See #1, again.