Friday, January 25, 2013

Sometimes I Just Need To Vent...

<p>So, I know I've mentioned the Husband ans I are going to counseling. We have yet to have a session together. I know how strange that sounds. However, the counselor does not feel that one of us is receptive at this time.<br>
One of us feels that they do no wrong, and that the other one is all at fault. That if the other one would only listen, and do what they are told, it would all be butterflies and rainbows.<br>
I totally get why we haven't had a session together yet, I really do. Deep inside, I know that when that session happens, the next few hours, days, or possibly even weeks, will be rough. Rougher than it even is now. <br>
Not that things aren't rough now. Believe me, they are. If I dare to express my opinion, or disagree with something as what time we should leave, I get the anger, the being ignored.<br>
The past few months, my new "punishment" is that he refuses to the dinner table with us. Everything can be going great, then I say that I don't agree with some thing or another. BAM!! It's yelling, then he's off to the bedroom, TV on. I tell.him dinner is ready, and I get told to shut the fuck up, to go away, and that he's not hungry. Somewhere in there will be a snide remark about how he has no say so, and is "only a paycheck". It doesn't matter that we both work and make similar incomes. Anyway, the kids and I will go ahead and eat. About 30 minutes later, he will venture.out of the bedroom, and do one of three things:
1) Sneer at whatever I've made,.shove the plate across the table, and make something of his own,  2) Actually eat what I've cooked, but mutter under.his breath the whole time,.or 3) Do either of the above and take off back to the bedroom to eat, slamming the door for added effect.
I'll admit that the.first few times, I was deeply hurt. Then, I started getting pissed. How dare he get on to the kids for.throwing tantrums and.pouting, when he's one of in the house at it??

Monday, January 7, 2013

I'm not OK with that.....

There's a page on Facebook that thinks it is humorous to refer to a 6 year old girl, and "tapping that". I have a lot of things I would love to say, but right now, I am so outraged I don't know where to start. I did leave a few comments on his page, but I know that deep down it won't make a difference to him, or his admins.

The thing is, in a group of five or six men, if one makes a rape joke, chances are there is a rapist in the group. That is a sad, scary, statistical fact. When the rapist hears that, he doesn't hear it as a joke. He hears it as confirmation that ALL men are rapists, and that what he has done or is going to do, is ok.

Interviews with rapists show over and over, that those who have been caught for rape fully believe that all men do the same things. They just haven't been caught, yet. 
So, what does a page that makes fun of "tapping" a 6 year old do? For a man (or woman), who has either considered raping a child, or has raped a child - they just got confirmation that it's perfectly ok. 
You know what, I'm not ok with that.....

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Bad Mom

I let my boys sleep in until 1 p.m. today. They're teenagers, so 1 p.m. is acceptable, isn't it??

I simply did not want to listen to them fight about who got to use the bathroom first.  (Does it make me a bad momma, knowing that at some point in the past, I've told one of them to just go outside??)

Or, who was responsible for the internet being slow, due to who's game was using the most bandwith. (It's a video game, for fuck's sake, does it really matter if you have to wait two seconds longer to talk to your friend in Australia, as you're running around following creepy looking little girls?)

By letting them sleep in, I didn't have to listen to them argue over who's turn it is to feed the dogs, carry out the trash, or do the dishes. (If you can't feed the dogs, then I guess I don't need to feed you!)

Yes, y'all. I'm a bad mom. I let them sleep in until 1 p.m., simply so I had an hour or so of peace and quiet. I was being selfish, in a way, I guess. However, I did wake them up when it was time for me to leave and go to work.

Now, they can fight and bicker all they want. The only ears there to hear it will be their own, and the dogs, that they will probably forget to feed......

Friday, January 4, 2013

Fun Mommy Blogger? Sorry, no!

I admit it, I read all the funny mom blogs, the stay at home mom blogs, the stay at home dad blogs, etc, etc. I often wonder if I could turn my life into something like that. Just leave out all the shit real stuff, and concentrate on those small moments in the day that someone might find funny. Then, reality hits.

I can't get on here and write about how wonderful my mornings are, and oh wasn't that SO CUTE when my twelve year old wouldn't get out of bed, after I'd relaxed in my spa shower, and had five cups of coffee. How I finally got him out by cooking a gourmet breakfast, with cute little fruit animals that I magically carved in fifteen seconds.

My normal day consists of trying to convince myself that yes, I really do need to get my ass out of bed. Pronto. I will push it to the absolute limit, leaving barely enough time to throw clothes on some days. Forget about breakfast (lunch?). Don't even think about make-up and hair. I simply don't allow myself enough time.  As for getting the kids up? Forget about it, I can't get them up with a crow bar most days. It finally comes down to standing at the door, pounding and yelling that they either get up, or I dump them out.

I'm not one of those moms that get to stay home all day, and bitch nicely joke about how hectic my day was. (Don't get me wrong - SAHMs do have their work cut out for them, but really, so does every parent, working or stay at home. And, to be blunt - most SAHMs don't have these perfect, sunny days they like to write about. Trust me, I know. I tried the SAHM gig for awhile.) I sure can't talk about how cute it was my friend Suzy brought her son, John Boy over for that perfect play date.  Oh, and isn't it just so adorable that the hellion sweet boy tried to attack the dog 5873 times, with a water gun?

The reality is, I do have a lot of that happen, but guess what? I'm at work! So, that means that in addition to working eight to twelve hours a day, I get phone calls about how the 19 year old is being mean, or the the 12 year old is being disgusting. Then, I get to go home to all the cumulative messes from the day, and spend four hours trying to get things back in order. Yep, that's a shitload of giggles, let me tell you!

I can't write about how while the darling demons children were out playing with their adorable little friends, I managed to look up five craft projects, 3 home improvement projects, and the perfect pot roast on Pinterest. (Oh, and get all the above done before the Husband gets off work, and walks through the door.)

No, I get to realize half way through the day that I forgot to set out meat, or start a crock pot. This means that I get to rush home at nine, and try and either A) defrost meat in the microwave B) try and figure out if I have anything in the cupboards that doesn't require meat, or C) declare it pizza night, again, for the third time this month. As for the craft projects on Pinterest? Well, I look at them online at about 2 a.m., think they're cute, decide not to repin them, because seriously, who has time for that shit??

Now, before everyone gets their panties all tied up in knots, I want to say that, yes, I do have a sense of humor. It's a little darker than most mommy's blogs. (In case you haven't figured that out from reading this post.) Also, yes, I stereotyped a lot of SAHM blogs, but seriously, have you read some of those things?? Only Stepford wives could be that fucking sweet and perfect.

Now, if you'd like to see what a real SAHM is like (trust me, it ain't baking cookies and snapping cute pictures of how perfect their kids are), I have a few blogs I can recommend:

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

New Year

Well, it's now 2013. The world didn't end. We didn't go over the dreaded fiscal cliff - well, we probably did years ago, but that's a whole other story.

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