Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Something's Gotta Give

Well, its official, we are on the borderline of broke. There's just enough $ to pay the next round of bills.
No one is spending money, so business is slower than its been in the last 12 years.
We have 6 people to support, feed and clothe. If something doesn't give soon, we're gonna have to start cutting back in places that can't be cut.
I don't know what to do.
I hide all my stress and worry....ok, not really....I just don't verbalize it like Husband does. I can look in the mirror and see the black circles under my eyes. My lack of caring if my hair is done. My lack of caring about what i wear. I used to wear makeup daily. Now? I'm lucky if its twice a month.
Husband thinks since I don't bitch about the money, or the issues with the kids, or whatever else is going on, that I don't care about it. I do. Trust me, I do. I just know that constantly talking about just keeps it that much more alive. Right in our faces. Right where you don't think you can even take another breath.
I know its depression. I know what would help it. But, I don't have a magic wand to make it happen.
All I can do is hope, and hold on.
I'm trying......it just doesn't seem to be working.
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